Celebrating Your Sexual Journey

I've experienced a lot of bachelorette parties this wedding season, and none of them were for me or any of my friends. They were all events I was working at, teaching at, etc. It's such a joy to be able to join in on people's celebrations, and it's fascinating to see how different people send off their friends into the world of marriage! A lot of them do it by getting drunk and acting stupid. Which is great! I totally appreciate the need to blow off steam and have a fun crazy night with the girls! I don't appreciate it quite as much when I'm trying to teach a bunch of people who are drunk and acting stupid, but on some level I totally understand it.

My favorite bachelorette party I've worked, though, was a bit different. There was definitely alcohol involved, and there was plenty of silliness going on, but the vibe was a bit different. A little more...shall we say sex-positive? When I arrived, the party was already in full swing. They were playing a game of documenting the bride's sexual history on a huge piece of paper on the wall. For each encounter (starting from her very first sexual encounter ever), the bride wrote her partner's name, how old she was at the time, drew a picture of the person's penis (hilarious!), and told the story of what had happened, while noting down relevant details like where it took place, specific fun facts about the encounter, etc.

The list was already quite extensive when I got there, and the best part was that no one was being judgmental at all. They were all so excited to re-live the bride's sexual journey along with her in a supportive, encouraging, and really fun way. When you're about to get married, what better way to celebrate than by remembering and sharing all the experiences that led you to this person with whom you plan to share your life?

Even though it's a totally archaic cultural trope, people still think of brides as virginal (note the white dress). Though some brides are virgins and are very happy about that, I think many, if not most, brides in the U.S. have had some previous sexual experience, which is such a great thing! Sexual compatibility is such an important part of marriage, and how are you supposed to know unless you take someone for a test drive? So I think it's so wonderful that this party was focused on celebrating all the experiences the bride has had that have led up to this exciting occasion. I hope she has a very happy marriage, and given some of the stories she was telling, I have a feeling she will!